Charlaine Harris’s ‘Definitely Dead’ – the collected reviews

Chapter One; wherein the plot starts and I am already confused.

Chapter Two; wherein Quinn and Sookie plan their first date.

Chapter Three; wherein there are weird penis metaphors and a proposal.

Chapter Four; wherein Sookie is a truly nasty person for no reason.

Chapter Five; wherein we meet the parents of Debbie Pelt and see a great amount of continuity problems.

Chapter Six; wherein Sookie saves a child’s life and Sookie finally turns down Calvin Norris.

Chapter Seven; wherein Sookie and Quinn go on their date.

Chapter Eight; wherein there is an attack.

Chapter Nine; wherein Quinn is an ass.

Chapter Ten; wherein a lot of uncomfortable shit happens.

Chapter Eleven; wherein all the important stuff is finally told to the reader.

Chapter Twelve; wherein it is very short and has too much Bill.

Chapter Thirteen; wherein Sookie finally gets to New Orleans.

Chapter Fourteen; wherein we meet the witch Amelia Broadway.

Chapter Fifteen; wherein ohshitohshitohshitohshitohshit.

Chapter Sixteen; wherein I am very angry about fairies and angels.

Chapter Seventeen; wherein we meet Sophie-Anne and see the power of magic in the Harrisverse.

Chapter Eighteen; wherein I declare my love for Sophie-Anne Leclerq.

Chapter Nineteen; wherein there is dry-humping and I disapprove.

Chapter Twenty; wherein there’s abduction and swamps.

Chapter Twenty One; wherein half the plot is resolved and it is rather unsatisfying.

Chapter Twenty Two; wherein all the shit goes down, and everyone dies.

Chapter Twenty Three; wherein there is EXPOSITION, EXPOSITION, EXPOSITION, LA LA LA LA LA LA LA.


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