A review of Laurell K. Hamilton’s ‘Cerulean Sins’ chapter forty


Jason leaned his head back against the passenger seat of the Jeep. His eyes were closed, and he looked weary. There were hollows under his eyes even with them closed.

Well… a hollow under your eyes is under your eyes, and would be unaffected by the movement of your eyelids.

Jason was fair-skinned, not pale. He didn’t tan dark, but nicely golden.

He couldn’t look not white. Then he’d be disgusting and not worthy of being fucked. Anita asks whether he’s going to be okay for the banquet tonight.

What banquet? There’s a banquet? What the fuck?

Jason asks whether he’d be on his way to a secure facility without Anita’s help – no shit mate – and Anita says that as he’s got scratches, that’s clearly enough to convict someone and imprison them for life. Then Jason starts writhing and shuddering around in the back of the car and this is just SO HAWT that Anita forgets that she’s driving and skids across the road almost killing every other driver and their passengers.

This makes Jason smug like a fucking snake about how Anita notices him sexually now and isn’t that great that she ‘really sees [him]’. Obvs there’s nothing worth aiming for in life other than being seen as sexually attractive by the opposite gender. Then he drops the news that the killer – the killer Anita is supposedly hunting down – is actually a werewolf, just not a local one.

Gee, thanks shithead. It would have been nice to tell her earlier! What, were you waiting for the opportune moment? Thanks to you, another woman has been raped and torn into pieces. Congrats. You are a terrible excuse for a person.

The reason he didn’t tell her is because Jason presumed Anita already knew. He presumed through the power of LAZY WRITING and TERRIBLE CHARACTERS.

The two dither about how dogs won’t hunt werewolves, so they can track the scent, until they realise that, hey, another werewolf might be able to track the scent!

clap

Anita will tell this to Zerbrowski when he calls, as he’s sure to call Anita to solve this case, as she’s clearly such an intuitive and intelligent person. But they might have to wait until two or three more women are dead to make the suggestion.

Jason is actually horrified by this but Anita doesn’t care. Humans aren’t really worth much in the grand scheme of things, after all.

So I guess it’s okay for someone to go kill your father and half-siblings. They’re not worth saving, I guess. God, Anita is such a disgusting person.

Then there’s a pointless point about how humans are the most dangerous animal of all *gags*. That point is so stale I could use it to knock down buildings.

I had offended Jason. Until that moment I hadn’t been sure it was possible to offend him.

Until now I didn’t realise that he had thoughts and feelings of his own! Until now I didn’t realise that he counted as life! Until now I didn’t realise that most people will be disturbed if you openly admit to not caring whether people live or die! Take your pick, they’re all valid options.

Either he was growing up, or I was getting less diplomatic. Since I couldn’t possibly get less diplomatic than usual, Jason must have been growing up. For the first time in a while, I wondered if he would always be content to be Jean-Claude’s lap wolf and appetizer. And stripper, too. But you can’t strip and feed the vampires forever, can you?

Christ, Jason might have like, dreams, ambitions, you know, things that mean you should treat him like a human being rather than an object. Scary stuff, that.

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