A review of Laurell K. Hamilton’s ‘Cerulean Sins’ chapter twenty five

There’s sixty two chapters in this book.

sad in the rain

We’re a third of the way in, and nothing is happening. A wild plot appeared some time ago, and has yet to make a reappearance.

I loved the new shower that I’d had installed in the downstairs master bathroom. One of the bear lycanthropes –

Shapeshifter. They’re not a wolf. They are a bear.

– in town turned out to be a plumber. I’d still paid full price, but at least I knew he wouldn’t be asking stupid questions about my living arrangements.

… and neither would any other plumber? Because they don’t give a fuck about your personal life? Because they want to get the job done? I have never had a plumber or builder or electrician ask my family about our living arrangements. Because GUESS FUCKING WHAT ANITA – NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR LIFE. NO ONE SPENDS THEIR LIFE IN AN AGONY OF NON-KNOWLEDGE ABOUT YOUR LIFE.

Anyway, Anita is worried because she doesn’t feel sad enough about sleeping with Jason.

That hard emotional truths bothered me more than having intercourse with someone I wasn’t in love with probably said something about how far down the well of moral decay I had fallen.

‘The well of moral decay’. Dear Lord, woman, grow up. Anita gets in the shower and cries about how awful her life is living as a glamorous celebrity who is fawned upon and respected by everyone she meets, has oodles of cash despite doing very little work, and has a legion of ridiculously attractive men desperate to have sex with her.

Your life is so hard, Anita. I don’t know how you cope.

Richard had broken some part of me, some last bit that had been trying to hang onto a softer more romaticized view of love. He had left, dumped me because I wasn’t human enough for him.

Is it nice in that made up world in which you just make up your own version of reality?

My stepmother, Judith, had never let me forget that I was small and dark, and she and her children were tall and blond, and blue-eyed. People had spent my lifetime rejecting me for things I could not change about myself. So fuck them, fuck them all.

Except that she didn’t really do that, did she? You just threw a bitchfit because Daddy didn’t show you all the attention and the love that you demanded.

Anita blubs in the bottom of the shower. Strong independent woman.

Why was I always chasing after the love of people who I could never be enough for?

You have never done that.

There was a knock on the door, and I realized that someone had been knocking for a while. I always locked the door when I went in, out of habit.

Who doesn’t lock the bathroom door when they’re in a house with other people? It’s not a habit, it’s to stop all those arseholes you live with jumping in the shower and raping you again.

It’s Jamil at the door with Richard. He needs to use the big bath because he was found unconscious due to the whole ‘BM feeding off Anita, JC, and Richard’ that Anita decided to not warn Richard about, despite the fact that if he dies, both JC and Anita die too.

“Anita, since the pack sold Raina’s house we don’t have any body of water big enough to soak him and other pack members in. I found him unconscious on his bedroom floor, he’s ice cold.”

Apparently, despite the fact that several pack members have BEEN SERIOUSLY INJURED SINCE RAINA DIED, there is not one single bath between them. And don’t shove someone who’s ice cold into a hot bath. That will kill them.

Belle hadn’t only fed her people off of me, she’d been feeding off of Richard, too. I’d thought about that earlier in the day, but I hadn’t dreamed that he wouldn’t call his pack and have some of them near him, to strengthen himself on their collected energy. I hadn’t known that he would have just let himself die. Because long before he got that bad he’d have known something was very wrong.

anger. extreme anger.

Maybe Richard could have done something. IF YOU HAD TOLD HIM WHAT WAS HAPPENING. After all, all Anita went through was being shaky and ill, like she had bad flu. How could Richard know he was under vague psychic attack if YOU DON’T TELL HIM?

Mother fucking son of a bitch. I could not believe that I was having to do this. The man that had broken my heart, called me a monster was about to get soaked in my bathtub for God knew how long.

  • ‘broke your heart’. Yeah, seemed like it when you ran off to get raped have sex with JC.
  • He called you a monster after you raped him.
  • Oh, no, a person you PROFESS TO CARE ABOUT is going to be in your bath. What a calamity!
  • Anita, if Richard dies, you die. Are you so stupid that you have forgotten that HUGE PLOT POINT?

Anita opens the door and hides. In a reaaallllyyyy uncomfortable paragraph.

I tried not to look at either of them, getting only a brief glimpse of Jamil’s cornrowed hair, bright red beads intertwined. His shirt was a red to match the beads, his suit jacket black. I didn’t take the time to see if his pants matched the jacket. I just started for the door, towels clutched to me.

“Can you turn on the water for me, Anita?” Jamil asked.

“No,” I said, and I fled.

OK, I get that LKH was trying to say ‘Anita is made uncomfortable to having to show emotion for someone who wronged her’. But considering how okay Anita with having the white shapeshifters around her when she’s naked, this whole thing reads like: delicate white flower is terrified of the terrifying black man who dares to exist in her presence! They’re all untrustworthy animals, you know.

So, yeah, Richard’s back. Yay. This can only get better, I’m sure.


4 thoughts on “A review of Laurell K. Hamilton’s ‘Cerulean Sins’ chapter twenty five

  1. – So, little thing about the AB werebears that Bugs Me. We get an offhand mention of a werebear plumber here, yeah? And there were werebears in NiC too. But in Affliction, suddenly werebears are uber super rare and almost extinct and most of the remaining ones are the servants of the Harlequin (yeah, enjoy reading about THOSE) and like…I’m not saying you couldn’t be a SUPER RARE SPECIES and not be a local plumber in St. Louis, but I am pretty sure LKH just forgot her own canon again.

    -Yeah, plumbers seriously don’t care and would in fact probably rather not know. LKH just really really wants people to care about HER life, so everyone has to care about Anita’s

    – “People had spent my lifetime rejecting me for things I could not change about myself.” SAID THE STRAIGHT WHITE CIS WOMAN (I am never buying Anita as anything less than the dreaded “whitebread”)

    – Seriously though where does LKH get this blondes valued over brunettes thing? They tend to go in cycles of which is more popular/which is dying their hair which, but at no point has there ever been a time, to my knowledge, where dark hair was considered just so gross and abhorrent. Vivien Leigh? Aubrey Hepburn? Liz Taylor? Or, if you wanna be more modern, Anne Hathaway and Katherine Laurence and Dita Von Teese? These ladies ringing any bells, Anita? They are all sex symbols with brown or black hair, just like you. Most even also have that oh-so-unusual pale skin to go with it. I just…her entire complaints about how she’s been oh oppressed for her looks, which range from unobjectionable (oh no, black hair!) to actually valued and eroticized (petite, curvy but in the ‘right’ way, with a big bust and tiny waist and no excess fat) would just be laughable and not enraging, save for the fact that she’s complaining about it in a world where it’s not only valued, but valued AT THE EXPENSE OF OTHER WOMEN WHO DO NOT HAVE THOSE TRAITS. I am a white woman of average size (thin until I graduated college, actually) so I can understand being ignorant of how much society values these things because I have never been treated poorly for my lack of whiteness or thinness/averageness, but even I’m *aware* just due to actually PAYING ATTENTION TO OTHER PEOPLE. Like I have a few people I follow online because of their blog content, and one is a fat white girl, the other is a mixed-race average/thin girl, and just reading some of the stuff that gets said to them or has been their experience, and then I look at this bullshit from Anita and I just…IT MAKES ME SO MAD! And we’re supposed to take it SERIOUSLY!

    – Anita has never chased after the love of anyone, everyone is expected to chase after her and she will get very, very upset if they do not

    – That description of Jamil’s outfit was sooo important and relevant and really makes her emotions seem believable right now. Also, ick, you make a really good point about how she’s always super chill with white shifters around her when she’s nude but SUDDENLY A PRUDE WHEN A BLACK GUY COMES IN HUH

    • You know the Post-It reminding her about werebears fell behind the desk. That’s always the answer for this sort of lazy bullshit.

      Laurell, like most white middle-class Midwesterners (well, white people from the US practically) has no apparent clue that A: lots and lots of Latinas will dye their hair blonde, to the point where George Lopez is cracking jokes over it, and B: THERE ARE A LOT OF WHITE LATIN@S. LIKE SERIOUSLY, A FUCKING LOT OF THEM. *pants* I know it’s because most people only run into migrant workers and their families, and, well, prejudice and racism, but seriously, Latin America is just as much a melting pot as the US. There are Japanese Brazillians FFS. This idea Laurell seems to have that Anita is so “exotic” and “ethnic” because she has dark hair will never cease to crack me up. Along with her endless wangst over Judith, because, bitch, please, I’m still being mistaken for my father’s girlfriend into my 30’s because we don’t racially resemble one another, but I don’t sit around and cry over it. Yeah, it pisses me off (because stereotype, much?), but it doesn’t dictate my life.

      • As an aside, I too get mistaken for my Dad’s girlfriend when we out in public sometimes. I have literally no idea why because we look really similar. I guess people think he’s too young to have an adult daughter? Either way, it really creeps me out.

    • – I’d have thought that werebears would be relatively common in the US because, well, there are bears in the US. In my own UF fiction book – that I am still working on, eugh, the one with lesbian YA protags – werebears are uncommon in Europe as the native population of bears has been eradicated in certain areas or at least suffered dramatic population losses. But then I like to make sense with my worldbuilding. LKH just goes with whatever seems cool.
      – It’s at the Circus, right? Wouldn’t a plumber just presume it was for performers? Why would they care?
      – I feel so sorry for you Anita Blake, you ablebodied cis white woman who has never known hardship.
      – Society does hold the traits of white women to be more attractive than those of other races, ethnicities, or just being slightly different than the ‘norm’. But Anita HAS ALL THE TRAITS VALUED BY SOCIETY AS BEING ATTRACTIVE. I do not understand her issues! There is nothing about her that is unattractive! Hell, I’d even accept that she was covered in acne scars or something, like I am. That’s at least something that could be perceived as a flaw. I see it as a flaw, because they’re damn well livid and red and all over my face. Fucking crater face, me.
      – Chasing after people implies effort. I can’t remember the last time Anita put effort into anything.
      – Jamil’s outfit makes him sound like a pimp stereotype. It’s super uncomfortable and I can’t believe no one has called LKH out on that.

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