A review of Laurell K. Hamilton’s ‘Narcissus in Chains’ chapter forty one


Two hours later I was sitting on my couch, talking to Zerbrowski.

Of course, we can’t have ANY CONSEQUENCES EVER HAPPEN IN THIS SERIES.

His wife, Katie, was a neat, orderly sort of person, and I’d never figured out why she allowed Zerbrowski to leave the house dressed like a walking disaster. Of course, maybe it wasn’t a matter of allowing him to do anything; maybe it was just one of those battles you just gave up on after a few years.

Or that no partner should be in a position to ‘allow’ the other to do things. Fuck off with your bullshit.

Caleb is all curled up under a blanket and d’awwwwww he’s in shock. He needs comfort. D’awwwwwwww. Poor little sexist lecherous horrible baby. Merle sits in the corner looking like he’s about to start punching people in the face. Wow, that’s going to help people think you’re innocent.

“So let me get this straight, these guys just burst in here, and you don’t have the first idea why.”

MMMMMM that’s good stock police officer talk. I have never heard a police officer talk like this and yet they all do in fiction. Anita isn’t giving anything else away and stares at all the forensic techs checking out her house. She judges them.

I glanced back to see Micah come out of the room. He was wearing a pair of my sweatpants. Since they were men’s sweats anyway and we were the same height, they fit perfectly. I’d never had a boyfriend that I could trade clothes with before. You just didn’t find that many grown men my size.

Funny that I can name four or five male characters who are the same size as Anita who appear in this book.

Anyway, Micah is stood covered in gunk and Dolph is glaring at everyone. Here’s the run down:

  • Nathaniel has been questioned by Jessica Arnet.
  • Caleb has been questioned by Perry, who is now questioning Zane.
  • Zerbrowski has been stalling so Anita can be questioned by Dolph, who has already questioned Merle and Micah.

Anita mentions that the dead SM have not turned back into human form which is suspicious. All shapeshifters turn back into humans on death so they must be something else. Dolph beckons Anita, and she holds hands with Micah. This makes Dolph MANGRY.

It was obviously a case of self-defense. The only difference from the other two times I’d had to kill people in my house was the number of bodies and that some of them was not human. Other than that, I’d walked on much more questionable occasions. So why was Dolph treating this one more seriously? I didn’t have a clue.

  • You have shot down and killed five people who were trying to invade your house.

No one is going to tap you on the wrist and say that you’ve been too naughty but they forgive you. This is a bit extreme. Dolph asks why the SM wanted Anita and she umms and ahhs mentally about trying to kill their leader, whoops, I didn’t think things through BECAUSE ANITA BLAKE DOESN’T UNDERSTAND HER ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES LIKE AN INFANT.

Sorry, it makes me angry.

Dolph points out they brought a lot of guns but Anita plays wide eyed innocent which makes Dolph more MANGRY. He punches a wall because that’s healthy. Although, I’d probably smash a lot of things if I had to deal with Anita. Zerbrowski pops his head round the door and is told to ‘get the fuck out’.

“I’m taking a lot of heat for you, Anita.”

“Not on this you’re not,” I said. “Everybody that you took out of this house won’t be human. The laws may cover shapeshifters as human, but I know how it works. What’s one more dead monster?”

argh

Anita is a idiot. This is exactly the sort of case which has the potential to blow up and became a groundmark case regarding the position of shapeshifters under the law. No one is going to cover up the murder of five people for you!

Dolph then forgets his MANGRY rage and asks what the SM are because they are not shapeshifters. He then reveals he is stressed and upset because his oldest son ‘Darrin’ has gotten engaged to a vampire. Dolph’s real manrage is because the women his sons are interested in can’t have children.

After all, that’s all women are for. Producing the next generation in a family. Women are just walking vessels, ready to plop out children for the happiness of men.

black widow

Fuck your misogyny.

Dolph breaks down and cries because there’s no one to carry the family seed on – good riddance I say – and they are sad for a page. He asks what happened with the SM and is sad because Anita won’t tell him anything. He then resumes MANGRY status because Anita admits she’s ‘fucking Micah Callahan’.

No, no, you’re being raped and abused by Micah. You should probably tell Dolph that.

Dolph pauses and makes as if he’s going to punch Anita in the face. What a guy. Anita wants to touch his face. STOP IT.

“The heart wants what the heart wants, Dolph. You don’t plan on making your life complicated, it just happens, and you don’t do it on purpose, and you don’t do it to hurt the people who love you. It just turns out that way sometimes.”

Being violently raped is not love. It will never be love. Stop for a moment and read the drivel you’ve produced.

Dolph says that his wife will call Anita for info on vampires. He tells her to get out and then he cries.

Go on, cry your man tears. I’m sure you’ll find some womb for your desperately needed progeny.

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12 thoughts on “A review of Laurell K. Hamilton’s ‘Narcissus in Chains’ chapter forty one

  1. Ah, Dolph and Zebrowski. I would pay good money for a spin-off where we see the Blakeverse through their eyes. I have a feeling that it would be like ‘Starsky and Hutch’, except Starsky has the mental age of a six-month old baby, and Hutch is compelled to hit on everything with legs. And I mean *everything* with legs.

    But in all seriousness, how is Dolph still a police officer? He’s as sharp as a wooden spoon, and every time he crosses paths with AB he has to sweep a pile of bodies under the rug. Sooner or later someone’s going to notice the floor’s getting lumpy and make the connection.

    I’ve found a page that I think applies wonderfully to the series, and that LKH should definitely read:
    http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/GratuitousRape

    • I’m surprised that Anita isn’t up on that page, actually. I might rectify that.

      On his introduction, Anita said that Dolph was being punished by being made head of RPIT. I understand why now.

  2. Dolph being upset about not having grandkids I can see; it’s an assumption a lot of parents have, that their kids will have kids and they’ll get to spoil them rotten. I know my mother was upset when I told her flat-out I wasn’t having any, and she’d be adopting if she wanted them.

    That in no way excuses his attitude, I can just find myself unsurprised that his major point of contention is that he’ll not have grand kids in the old-fashioned way.

    And I don’t know why, but Anita (and Laurell’s, by extension) has an obsessive thing with her boyfriend being able to wear her clothes. Even though men’s and women’s clothing can be the same “size” but not always fit exactly right on the opposite sex. Especially since Anita supposedly runs around with Dolly Parton’s boobs; I can’t imagine Micah wearing her shirts and not looking like a little boy playing dress-up with dad’s flannels.

    • Dolph phrased his hatred in the worst terms possible. He didn’t even refer to his son’s partners by name. They’re just wombs to carry the almighty line of Dolph.

      It’s really weird. I don’t get why you’d want to share all your clothes with your partner. They’re my clothes! If he wants to wear women’s shirts, then he can buy his own!

      • Honestly? I think the clothes sharing is in some way a symbol of ownership. Like “he/she is wearing MY clothes.” I could be wrong, because unless I’m cold and I want to grab a shirt, I myself do not feel the need to wear my SO’s clothing either. (Also, I don’t think I’ve ever been intimate with anyone who’s been anywhere near my size; in this, I share Anita’s surprise at any male being able to share our clothing. I wear men’s cargo shorts with relative ease, but jeans? Not very easy considering hips and waistlines.)

      • I steal my boyfriend’s shirts fairly often, and in turn my spouse steals mine. Nobody gets to wear their own shirts in my house, bwahaha!
        For me, it’s not about ownership, though Lord knows where Anita/LKH’s brain goes with it. It’s partly a status symbol – someone trusts you so much they let you have one of the more ‘intimate’ things they possess, and you can publicly show it. Your clothes go right next to your body and you don’t generally give them to just anyone.
        The other thing is that it’s comforting – I can wear my boyfriend’s shirt and look down and feel like I have a little piece of them with me all day. It’s like a metaphorical cuddle! And yes I am occasionally a big mushy weenie girly person. Anita would shoot me on sight, lol.

      • I like to wear my husband’s button downs and sometimes his boxer briefs. I feel sexy in them, and yes, a little bit owned, which is a kink of mine. Maybe that’s what’s going on with Anita and Micah?

  3. To be honest, Dolph’s reaction isn’t what really bothers me about this. No, what bothers me is that I know for a fact that this same (or at least a similar) sub-plot is used in another AB book – just replace “marrying” with “dating”.

    Seriously, LKH pays no attention to what she writes.

    And whats worse, this could actually be an interesting plot – at least more interesting than what’s being passed off as plot in this book.

    • I think there’s a lot of really good potential in a story with a father/mother coming to terms with their child being in a serious relationship with a vampire. As long as it wasn’t a ramble about the lack of viable wombs.

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