A review of Laurell K. Hamilton’s ‘Narcissus in Chains’ chapter thirty three


Richard’s come in the room!

I froze with Nathaniel’s face cradled in my hands, him kneeling between my legs with the table hiding most of him, having just risen from kissing him, and knew how it looked. I wasn’t sure I would explain it to Richard’s satisfaction.

And Anita has to cook a roast dinner for her boss and the washing machine exploded! And there’s a ferret on the loose! And Nathaniel has to replace a pot plant!

I only like my soap operas when they have lots of country music and melodrama. And are called Nashville. And are well-written.

Anita kisses Nathaniel some more to try and play it natural. Richard doesn’t know about the ardeur yet, so Nathaniel sticks his head in her lap which makes him invisible. Richard struts into the room filling the place with POWER and then stares down at Nathaniel. Jamil and Shang-Da hang around the door. Anita says she was just comforting Nathaniel and Richard is angry, his power ‘hot, like opening the door to an oven’.

Heads up to wanna be authors: LKH doesn’t read other books in her genre. You should always keep on reading the genre you want to work in. Reading the works of others will make sure you don’t use stupid metaphors like this. Reading widely is really important for keeping your writing skills good!

Anita blathers on that she and Nathaniel were discussing the effects of vampire marks. Richard says oh, right the ardeur because JC decided to tell me behind your back because we think you are incompetent. He tells her she can never feed off him, which gets Anita mad because how dare he not consent to what she wants. Anita starts to pet Nathaniel as if he’s a dog.

Nice.

Richard and Anita nag at each other about how he dumped her and how she jumped into bed with someone else really quickly. For a start, no, she was raped, and Richard leapt into bed with other people very quickly and wagged it in her face. He then throws a table, because violence is always the answer.  He throws it around some more and examines Nathaniel’s bite marks. Richard starts to forcibly strip Nathaniel to examine them some more. He physically threatens him and demands to know ‘did she suck you off?’

Nathaniel is justifiably scared of all this – even conmen have to worry about being murdered – and this means Richard can’t tell whether it happened or not. Anita whips out a knife and rams it next to Richard’s throat.

I’m so glad that all these people are super powered.

Richard taunts her with how she can’t kill him because he’s crucial to saving Gregory and all that jazz. Anita knows she can’t kill him so she just slices up his arm instead. She and Nathaniel run out the room, Anita saying that Richard must never hurt one of her leopards, never ever.

“It would serve you right if I just walked out and left you and your leopards to fend for themselves.”

This doesn’t come with a dialogue descriptor, so I can only presume Richard said this. It’s the only character who could. Richard then bewails how he just lets everyone down all the time and how Anita is always right all the time. Eurgh.

Dr Lillian comes in and scolds everyone for being such naughty scamps and playing with knives. Oh, isn’t it so naughty to try and kill each other! Anita then realises that Richard is really jealous about Nathaniel ‘in a way that he shouldn’t have been’. Why shouldn’t he be? He clearly thinks he has exclusive rights to your body, it’s obvious that he would be jealous. But, oh wait, that’s me using my brain, an organ Anita doesn’t possess. Woops, look at me lording my brain privilege over her.

She wonders why Richard might be jealous about her having sex with Nathaniel.

merida exhausted

Thirty three chapters in and I’m still desperately searching for a plot. Why won’t it show up? Is it scared?

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10 thoughts on “A review of Laurell K. Hamilton’s ‘Narcissus in Chains’ chapter thirty three

  1. Hi,
    I found your blog a while ago, but I wanted to get up to speed before I posted a comment. First things first, I applaud you for managing to wade this far along the river of tripe that is the Anita Blake series (*claps*), and may you continue to lord your brain privilege over Anita for as long as you can stand it.

    I have a few other things I want to comment on (JC, Mary Sue SI characters, JC, LKH’s insensitive approach to rape, JC…you get the idea), but I’ll save that for a later time.

  2. “He tells her she can never feed off him, which gets Anita mad because how dare he not consent to what she wants.”

    Oh, this.

    Yeah, I read a sporking/recap of one of the later books (Cerulean Sins, if you’re curious), and *spoilers* she totally disregards his not-so-minor request. Because Anita is a horrible person.

    “Richard and Anita nag at each other about how he dumped her and how she jumped into bed with someone else really quickly. For a start, no, she was raped, and Richard leapt into bed with other people very quickly and wagged it in her face.”

    To be fair, she did abandon Richard after repeatedly saying she wouldn’t, and (either through LKH’s authorial intervention or JC’s mind-rape – your choice) does not consider what happened to her to have been rape. I’m not arguing whether it was or wasn’t, just pointing out that, of the two of them, Anita is probably more in the wrong here re: their relationship. Though Richard is rapidly making up for that (mostly because LKH has decided to make him her whipping boy).

  3. I haven’t been commenting lately because I haven’t been reading lately because I’m Anita’d out

    glad to see I haven’t missed much (that’s a comment on the total lack of plot of the book, not your superb spork quality btw <3)

  4. Pretty sure she can’t kill Richard because that also fucks up the triumvirate, and might kill her too, but I’m also sure LKH forgot that particular problem ages ago. Even though a similar event occurred at the end of two of her books, and a relevant plot point.

    Why oh why can’t Anita “accidentally” kill Richard and then doom them all?

    • Spoilers?

      Even in future books, when all established metaphysical lore states that the death of one is the death of all, Anita uses the powers of being Anita to make an established villain act OOC and save their worthless butts. This somehow drags the dead one out of death. Or something. The scene suffers from Anita’s habit of falling unconscious.

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