A review of Laurell K. Hamilton’s ‘Obsidian Butterfly’ chapter thirty three


A door has been torn out of the wall by the rampaging beastie.

“Damn splinters.” Bradford[/Bradley] held up the palm of his gloved hand and there was a small crimson spot on the plastic. He jerked the glove off. The splinter seemed to have come off with the glove, but it was bleeding freely.

Anita Blake: The Mystery of the Splinter!!!!!!!!

i’ve had many splinters in my time, but i’ve never had one that makes me start bleeding instantly. I don’t think I’ve had a single splinter that made me bleed. They hurt, but they’re not really very serious.

Not as serious as that police officer being bandaged up by EMTS. Are we ever getting to that?

oh shit man

Bradford then has to go get his splinter wound bandaged up by the ambulance crew.

He was having to cup one hand under the other to catch the blood so it didn’t reach the carpet.

What kind of splinter was it, to cause instant bleedy death? Was it a magic splinter? Because… splinters don’t do that. Especially if they’re small enough to be pulled away when you remove surgical gloves. This is not how the real world operates. Unless it’s a huge flying piece of shrapnel that hit Bradford/Bradley in the eye, this should not be serious.

Bradford/Bradley runs to the ambulance, followed by Anita. He then tells her to look around. Which she does. For two pages. She just stares at things for two pages until Detective Ramirez shows up. They talk about the mutilations and then hug. She then goes on about how she used to think vampires were monsters but now doesn’t and how she needs a vacation.

Ugh.

I’ve been re-watching Being Human again and I just want Herrick to come in and tear her head off.

plus i get to indulge my perverse asexual lust for Hal. We would listen to Radio 4 while reading poetry and knitting. It would be glorious.

Anita goes on and on and on about how it’s so hard being friends with monsters for a page and a bit, before Ramirez offers to walk her back to the house. He asks questions about the crime scene, so we can finally learn what happened. The police were called by a guest, who is now in hospital. Then Anita says that the rest of the guests took off to the mountains because the ‘restless’ spell was apparently performed on the neighbours not the murder victims like I thought. Because we can’t have an easy Clue.

Anita has finally cottoned onto the fact it was a spell making people go out at night. Well done. She reasons it’s probably witchcraft or some sort of magic that is not a creature’s natural magic – like a vampire’s glamour, etc. Ramirez says there was blood on the door.

“Great. I wish someone would tell me when we find a clue.”

there are plenty of clues Anita

YOU HAVE JUST BEEN IGNORING ALL OF THEM

Ramirez then says they simply must get back to the house because Anita is going to get a ‘worse reputation’ for being in the company of A MAAAAANNNN

Anita then goes on about how men can only see women as sex objects, without seeming to understand that that is not nature, but patriarchy. She then thinks about ‘Hernando’ (jesus could you get more stereotypical) and his future, and how she can’t possibly be having a mid-life crisis!

Well, yes, you can be having a life crisis.

“Marks said that one of the first cops on the scene had his throat nearly bitten out. How did that happen?”

I’d like to know, seeing as the only injured cop we saw was having his hand bandaged up.

oh, and you know the family who had the soul in that house? The Bradwells? Their missing son is fine, he’s alive. He turned up offscreen.  And it seems that the mutilation victims in the house bit the police officer. And then Anita bursts into this huge spiel about how she’s an ANIMATOR and SHE KNOWS THE DEEEEEAAAAAADDDDD.

“I’m saying that maybe there are no survivors. Maybe there are just dead and the living dead.”

save me hal, let us listen to radio four dramas

oh and there’s another body in the house to go look at.

i hate this book

hate it

hal rescue me please

 

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3 thoughts on “A review of Laurell K. Hamilton’s ‘Obsidian Butterfly’ chapter thirty three

  1. I have had a splinter that I needed a doctor to take care of. It was a couple of inches long, lodged under my finger nail, and couldn’t be removed by first aid on site because that might have broken my thumb. True story. In short, if your splinter wound is bad enough that it’s dripping on the floor, there will not be a ‘small spot of crimson’. And where the hell did the splinter come from anyway? This is a stupid detail. If it doesn’t turn out that the splinter was actually part of a brain-controlling tree and was seeking a host I’m not interested.

    I said I wanted to see the plot. So why am I still so bored?

    • But Bradford/Bradley didn’t seem to have a serious splinter, and yet he suffers bleedy death. Maybe he’s just a weird sort of vampire, and gets really injured when you stab him with wooden objects.

      Possibly because the plot is happening outside of the book?

      brain controlling trees yes trees for franklin to battle

      • Maybe he has some kind of extreme version of hemophilia or something.

        What? It makes about as much sense as anything else in these books.

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