A review of Laurell K. Hamilton’s ‘Obsidian Butterfly’ chapter twenty three PART TWO


I wasn’t having a great night. First, I let the nice lady be mind-raped, then I terrorized drunken tourists. I would have said, how could the night get worse, but worse was waiting.

She’s talking about the other two women. Who have also been mindraped. Why haven’t you got any sympathy for them?

Anita walks to the man in the g-string who instantly fawns over her and proclaims ‘My hero, thank you’.

Yes, that poor man, who is being groped by mindraped women as part of a stage show.

Anita is instantly turned on by the man in the g-string fawning over her, and he rubs his face in her hair. He reveals his name to be César and he smells good. And she knows that he is a shapeshifter to boot.

Shapeshifters always recognize each other.

You are not a shapeshifter, Anita. Just say your magic powers can tell.

Anita can tell that César is another member of a vampire triumvirate and that they are both sad. He then strokes her and fills her with POWER. They smush faces and this is sexy. I feel sorry for everyone who paid cover to watch this. Anita thinks about sex and then pushes him away. He apologises, then arranges to meet up backstage.

César returns to groping mindraped women. The priest makes Anita move closer, although… no one has been doing any walking. LKH has not mentioned anyone moving on stage, and now the mindraped women and César are having a mini-orgy. This is the most horrible show. Who pays money to see a rape orgy?

Some random woman jumps up on stage and a jaguar drags off one of the mindraped women. All the mindraped women are dragged away and replaced by actors for the orgy.

The actors weren’t really doing anything, but it must have looked awful from the audience’s point of view. Clothes flew and the women were topless. I wondered if the shadows looked as topless as the real thing.

Ignoring the monumental stupidity of that last sentence, if the show looks so awful, why does it exist?

The high priest apologises to Anita for this, saying they wouldn’t have chosen her if she wasn’t human and they were unable to tell before now…. because reasons. He doesn’t apologise for the massive rape that took place, but who cares about that? It’s more important for the priest to brutally slaughter the werejaguar who chose Anita in front of a room of tourists.

Anita jumps in by saying she isn’t a lycanthrope, which is proclaimed as lies, although the WEREJAGUAR AND THE VAMPIRE SHOULD BE ABLE TO TELL. He calls César over who says that as she was turned on that means she’s a shapeshifter.

I tried to think of a short version that would make sense. I made two starts, before I finally said, “There is too much. I will sum up.” I even threw in a bad Spanish accent.

The priest’s face stayed blank and unhappy. He did not get the movie reference. César choked back another laugh. He’d probably seen The Princess Bride.

Making move references when you are fighting to save an innocent man’s life is a bullshit thing to do. And yeah, forgive the centuries old Aztec man for not knowing The Princess Bride. He probably took offence at your dodgy Spanish accent or it brought back bad memories of the colonial forces that devastated his culture and killed his people! So fuck your face and your movie references! They are not smart or clever! Why can’t you just say ‘I’m in a triumvirate’? People don’t give a shit about your life, Anita, they’re not going to look through that clever disguise and instantly know it’s you!

The priest slashes the werejaguar, César whines, Anita touches people, she pulls out a knife, werejaguars stalk at her, the priest has an obsidian blade, Anita just makes everything worse and knows it, and throws her hand on the priest’s blade. She says that because she can’t heal quickly, she’s obviously not a shapeshifter. The priest licks her blood from the knife.

And now the mindraped women are brought back on stage, and Anita goes up with them. They are ordered to strip. Anita only cares about Ramona, and tries to stop her. César jumps in to say all the women have to be naked. Anita refuses so he tries to rip her clothes from her body. He bites her and Anita stops this by… lighting pushing on his chin.

Right.

This stops César so he goes and assaults another woman. Romana then wakes up and starts screaming. She has to be dragged off-stage and handed over to who I presume is her boyfriend, who must have found the whole show so fun.

I would have to talk to someone about her. I couldn’t leave town without knowing that the mind tricks weren’t permanent.

BULLSHIT

The conflict in the very first book is kicked off because mindraping is NOT REVERSIBLE. Catherine was mindraped, and that meant the vampire had permanent control over her for the rest of her life. That was your establishing conflict to get Anita involved in the crime plot! How did you forget this?

César then licks Anita’s bleeding hand and she goes back to her group.

Dallas actually got up from her chair and came to talk to me, hanging over the back of my chair. “What happened back there? I’ve been a volunteer, and I’ve never seen anyone hurt.”

For a start, Dallas, you know what happened. You saw what happened. And bullshit much? You have watched a succession of women get mindraped and sexually assaulted. You yourself have been mindraped and sexually assaulted. And this is supposed to be an entertaining stage show?

Anita and Edward talk shit about his ‘plan’ and that he doesn’t have one and it’s pointless.

The stage show concludes and then a waitress brings the gang their meal. Um, what kind of fucking nightclub is this? No dance floor, no bar, a rape orgy, and then a meal. What type of ‘club’ is this? What kind of place do you go out, watch a show, and then have a meal served to you? This is not a nightclub! This is a very fucked up restaurant!

Anita then bitches because she’s served… veal. And each time it comes up, it’s called that. The characters have a conversation about… veal. Personally, I really like veal. Sue me, I enjoy eating baby animals, and the UK has very strict rules on the welfare of animals that are going to be slaughtered. However, methods are far more cruel in America, where the use of crates is not illegal in 41 states. Anita says she doesn’t like veal because of the cruelty, but I don’t buy that from a woman who hasn’t fed her fish in over seven books. Those things must be floating blobs of goo by now.

She also says that she hates the texture, although she likes beef so I don’t know what she’s bitching about.

I took a forkful of an unrecognisable vegetable, then realized it was sweet potatoes. I didn’t recognize the spices in them. Of course, cooking wasn’t exactly my area of expertise.

Aren’t sweet potatoes more popular in the south east, rather than the south west? And who the fuck cooks for you, Anita? You have to cook for yourself at some point. You don’t just stare at food until you feel full. Why not say ‘I’m not familiar with southwestern food’? Or talk about the fact that you don’t like Mexican food? Why is every single thing about these books wrong?

Edward and Anita both don’t eat the… veal, and this means it is vaguely suspicious for some reason. And then there’s going to be another show on and ooooohhhh it’s all suspicious and shit.

I don’t understand why this book is considered a highlight of the series.

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3 thoughts on “A review of Laurell K. Hamilton’s ‘Obsidian Butterfly’ chapter twenty three PART TWO

  1. It’s a highlight mostly because it doesn’t have two particular jackasses making the conflict even worse. And it’s the last book before the sex completely takes over, and her tight wet vagina proclaims its godhood over the rest of the thropes. But, yes, it’s essentially damning it with faint praise.

    I have to admit, I don’t eat much beef because of the texture myself, so I can see how she wouldn’t like the veal for that reason. But the taste is perfectly fine: no, I don’t understand my quirks either. And yeah, you’re basically correct on the cruelty thing: that’s another reason I won’t touch veal in particular, or foie gras. But I’d feel hypocritical never eating beef when I have no problem wearing leather.

    And you know, I never really noticed the sweet potato thing before. Honestly, I would agree that it’s more of a southeastern thing, except around Thanksgiving and Christmas where it can end up in a dessert that’s topped with even more sugar. But I’ve also noticed it’s been ending up on more restaurant menus lately, due to its nutritional value, usually as fries. So it’s entirely possible this Titty Twister knock-off was on the cutting edge of cuisine.

    …..riiiiight.

  2. My question is why would any sane rational person have an appetite after watching…a show like that? Also, sweet potatoes are blegh to me. I don’t know why but I just can’t stand them.

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