A review of Laurell K. Hamilton’s ‘Blue Moon’ chapter twenty four


The greeting ceremony that had been interrupted last night was back on for tonight.

It wasn’t interrupted. Anita decided to go away and fight with vampires. The ceremony barely got a mention. LKH came up with something interesting that didn’t really go anywhere and thrust it into the plot where it sat and didn’t really do anything worthwhile.

Executing almost all of Colin’s vamps meant that Verne’s pack was in charge now. They had the personnel to keep Colin from making more vamps. Apparently, if there was no tie between vampires and wereanimals in an area, then whoever had the strength could rule over the others.

Why. Why does that mean vampires get to rule over wereanimals. Can’t you tell me why. Why won’t you ever explain your shitty worldbuilding.

Anyway, Anita walks out through the trees and says how wereanimals aren’t people (can you stop that.) and how it’s so obvious that they aren’t people because they look like people. Jamil walks up on her, probably waiting to get back for her cutting him, but Anita is preoccupied. The werewolf ghosts are ‘calling’ to her, and she’s just circling around being possessed.

Richard had informed me that my killing of Colin’s vamps inside the lupanar would be our gift, the gift that the visiting Ulfric and lupa gave to the resident pack.

The gift was usually a freshly killed animal, jewelry for the lupa, or something mystical.

Oh, so the man gets the mystical stuff and the killed animal, but the woman gets jewellery. Because a woman would never want anything else.

Anita complains about how she isn’t allowed to have her gun, but she still has that huge knife down her back.

The big knife down my spine was still invisible unless you looked really hard at my back.

A two foot knife is not invisible, unless it has some sort of spell cast upon it to make it literally invisible.

Let me demonstrate.

TPhoto_00082

I’m using this roll of gift wrap as my stand in super illegal sword.

TPhoto_00083

If I wear it as Anita wears her knife, you can see how obvious it is that I have a roll of gift wrap stuffed down the back of my shirt. It also makes it really hard to turn my head around and move easily, so it’s a really stupid way to carry a weapon around.

Anita then goes on about her new favourite toy, a four-inch switchblade that is massively illegal. She is so insufferably smug about how her ‘friends’ found her this perfect knife and I just want her to stop.

Anyway, the wereleopards arrive and everyone starts going on about how amazing it is that Anita can feel the call of the werewolves, even though she’s joined in a mystical bond with a werewolf and is the co-leader of a werewolf pack. In short, it’s hard to act as if something is wonderful and amazing when it’s entirely expected.

Richard isn’t with them, as he’s with his family. That is where I would expect him to be, considering he was in a police cell for X amount of days.

His mother just hadn’t understood why he couldn’t stay longer. All of the Zeeman men were so pussy whipped – ah, henpecked, sorry.

I’m sorry, but when a mother asks to see her son when he’s been confined in a cell and accused of a disgusting crime, I am not going to call her a horrendous nagging harpy. I am going to call her a mother who has been intensely stressed and not knowing whether her son is going to prison and is overjoyed that he has been released. But no, we must throw around sexist insults for the crime of ‘wanting to spend time with your child’.

Anita finally works out that, oh yeah, the reason why she’s being affected by werewolf magic is because she’s magically joined with Richard. Tell me, when did it become so bad to have a character that was intelligent? Jason touches her shoulder, and Raina’s memories flood into her head. Everyone crowds around her, and then Anita falls on the floor, rolling around and screaming. I should feel sorry for her, but I’m enjoying her pain right now.

Anita ends up sharing the memories with Jason and Cherry – Cherry who, it turns out, was forced into having sex with Raina, and starts freaking out because she can smell her and bursts into tears. Why isn’t Cherry the heroine of this series? I like Cherry. Anyway, there is mass confusion over this but luckily the pack’s witch turns up in the right amount of time to explain this all away.

Anita accuses her of not being a werewolf as Marianne – the witch – doesn’t ‘taste’ like a werewolf. Marianne makes her own energy, and praises Anita for using the word ‘taste’ instead of ‘feel’ as ‘feel’ is too imprecise. If it were me, I’d say that taste has a very specific context whereas feel can be used appropriately in either context. Marianne isn’t a werewolf anyway, but instead of being made interesting in her own right, she is yet another fawner.

They all start talking about how there might be fight, as Richard is being a knob by running around and sleeping with all the women and being all dominant. So, not making any effort to fit into the local pack at all then. Anita then says how much she looks like Red Riding Hood which… no. Anita, you’re walking into the woods in a massive group of people, and you’re not a little girl. It doesn’t work on any level. Marianne tries making some jokes but Anita threatens her in response. She has the nerve to call Marianne ‘condescending’ then outright call her a ‘backcountry wisewoman’ so, you know, a hick.

Marianne asks to touch Anita’s hand to judge how powerful she is. The pack thinks Anita will steal all their powers because, you know, hicks. Anita reluctantly holds out her left hand. Marianne tells her this is an insult. Anita refuses to change, as how dare you ask that she respect your culture.

They start sensing each others auras. This confirms that they are both powerful. Anita can sense that Marianne has an artificial valve in her heart, but only yells at Marianne when she tries to explain it. The sound turns Anita on and she decides she would like to kill Marianne. Anita seems to be worried by this, but I don’t see what’s so different from normal.

 

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2 thoughts on “A review of Laurell K. Hamilton’s ‘Blue Moon’ chapter twenty four

  1. I would like to be outraged by any of this, and yet it all has become such a weird, surreal stream-of-consciousness mess that I’m not 100% sure why any of it is happening, which makes getting furious hard.

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