A review of Laurell K. Hamilton’s ‘Guilty Pleasures’ chapter twenty nine

It’s a long chapter today guise. It’s actually about ten pages. I think we ought to have a party for Hamilton, for being able to put things together and not break up her narrative.

I slipped on the damp grass. Hose are not made for running in.

Pfft. Pussy. I went to an all girls’ school and wore a skirt and tights every damn day. It’s not difficult to run in them. Grow up and stop whinging.

Little Miss Nikky turns up out of nowhere and acts like an amalgamation of every evil old vampire, ever, with a touch of childlike whimsy. She sort of skips around being evil, while Anita bleats about not hurting the zombie she and Zachary raised. They talk about ghouls feasting on the dead (which they do not) and how ludicrous it is for Anita to be making demands of anyone in her position.

And then it’s two pages of Nikky saying ‘Let me feed on you’ and Anita saying ‘no’. It boils down to a ‘maybe’ if they free the zombie or lay it to rest or i have no idea what is happening and why i should care it’s so circular EUGHHHHHH

The top of her head fitted under my chin. She had to rise on tiptoe to breathe on my neck. It should have ruined the menace. It didn’t. Soft lips touched my neck. I jerked. She laughed against my skin, face pressed against me. I shivered and couldn’t stop.

Hi again, Claudia. Nice to see you’re actually unalive and well.

Anita ruins this intimate moment by bringing up that Nikky has a scar on her lip. Nikky flips her shit but Anita is saved by the timely intervention of Phillip. He starts yelling about how she promised not to hurt her and Nikky is all like ‘lol bring it’.

This is not going to be pretty, is it?

A pale little hand shot out, the barest touch. His whole body jerked backwards. He rolled on one side, blood staining his face.

What exactly was your plan, Phillip? Rush at her with the power of your abs?

Phillip is in turn saved by mob ex machina as the fellowship of the sun the Church of Eternal Life turn up to break up the party. Crappy fight and escape scene away! Because it is very anti-climatic, as it’s all humans and vampires I don’t know popping up from nowhere and shooting at them as Anita struggles to find her keys. Charlaine Harris is good at writing fight scenes. Hamilton is not so far.

End of chapter. Can I have some plot in the next one please?

2 thoughts on “A review of Laurell K. Hamilton’s ‘Guilty Pleasures’ chapter twenty nine

  1. Hi! A friend turned me on to reading your Guilty Pleasures reviews, and I just love them! I liked the Anita Blake series in high school, and hate how it’s gone down the tubes, but now as a college graduate re-reading the old stuff through you, I can see how it was doomed from the beginning. Anyway, I’m finding your critiques really enjoyable and apt, and I hope you end up doing all the AB books like you seem to have done the Sookie Stackhouse ones. I’ve also started sporking later books in the series for my friends, and I’m thinking about getting a blog for said sporkings like you have–you’re that cool!

    • If you get an AB blog please send me the link – I’d love to read it! I’m not sure whether I’m going to do the later books as I’ve only got the first five (I own all the Sookie Stackhouse ones) and I’m having trouble getting through the first one.

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