A review of Charlaine Harris’s ‘All Together Dead’ chapter sixteen


Onto the lesser court cases, both of which are interesting. The first one is kinda hilarious.

The vampire Jodi was pretty formidable.

She broke off a vampire called Michael’s fang in his sleep.

The two complaining vampires were not represented by lawyers. They said their piece, and then the judges got to ask questions before they decided the verdict by a majority vote. It was simple in from, if not in fact.

Michael is a super large cockhole. He abducted and tortured the sister of one of Jodi’s employees after the woman had rebuffed him in public. Oh, no, she offended you by refusing to sleep with you! The judges are very much on Jodi’s side on this, so she gets to stake Michael for being a whiny rapey ass.

The second case involves a child that was turned. He was dying of a blood disease and a vampire named ‘Cindy Lou’ offered to turn him as she always wanted children. However, now she’s refusing his real parents visiting rights while still taking their money. The vampire judges can’t grant him a new guardian, but say that he has to spend time with his human parents for as long as they choose to enforce their right.

“If you try to terrorize your human parents, or coerce them, or drink their blood, we will amputate your hand. And when it grows back, we’ll amputate it again.”

Super Nanny – Vampire edition.

Sookie then spends the rest of the evening helping Sophie-Anne negotiate deals to rebuild New Orleans. You’d think that her new found ability to sense a vampire’s feelings would be useful here, but this plot point has been dropped like it’s hot. So much for that.

After this she talks to Jake Purifroy who tells her to be anywhere but the hotel tomorrow. Oh no, that’s not a massive fucking hint that something bad is going to happen. My lord, the man could not be more obvious or suspicious but Sookie is like ‘LALALALALALALA oh by the way andre, man i decided not to talk to, Christian Baruch put the coke can bomb outside sophie-anne’s room to scare her into marrying him’.

When Sookie is heading up to bed, Bill comes up to her to ‘talk’. No. No. Do not want. Does not compute. Why is he not dead yet?

“I would give it all away if I could erase what happened between us, he said. “Not the times we spent loving each other, but…”

“The times you spent lying to me? The times you pretended you could hardly wait to date me when it turns out you were under order to? Those times?”

Thank you! Finally, she is dealing with the repercussions of Bill’s bullshit. She’s mooning after him no longer and can move on with her life. Good!

He then asks her if she loves any man, cause obviously if she doesn’t love him, she is INCAPABLE of loving anyone.

I want to hurt him.

Dottie Smith’s video channel, where she reviews romance books, movies, and does recaps for the TV show ‘Supernatural’

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