A review of Charlaine Harris’s ‘Dead as a Doornail’ chapter six


Sookie phones Tara to borrow something nice for the funeral, because apparently she can’t be bothered to help her friend with the abusive relationship she’s in but she can still get to borrow her stuff.

Hate to say it, but dick move.

Doubly dick move as on the next page we learn that Tara had an extremely abusive childhood at the hands of her alcoholic parents.

Sookie heads over to Tara’s, knowing that Mickey is sleeping there.  She makes Tara’s bed and takes a suit.  It’s clothes porn time I do believe.

Hanging in the middle of the rear rack was a knit suit.  The jacket was black with creamy pink facings on the lapels, meant to be worn over the matching pink shell on the hanger beneath it.

The black skirt was pleated.

I had some black pumps and a purse, and even some black gloves that I’d tried to save for nice.

I French braided my hair and rolled the remaining tail under, securing everything with some antique hairpins my grandmother had stashed away; they’d been her grandmother’s. I had some black hose, fortunately, and a black slip, and the pink of my fingernails at least coordinated with the pink of the jacket and shell.

This is getting beyond funny. I am seriously fed up with the loving detail that goes into describing Sookie’s outfits. I do not care enough for this.  I hate to say ‘show, don’t tell’ with stuff like this, but I think it needs a similar principle with two guiding questions.  Number one: does the plot of the book need this precise information about her outfit?  Number two: can you give it justice in three lines or less?  I do not care about what Sookie is wearing. I care about what she is doing and what she is saying.  Please stop with this bollocks about her clothes.  No one gives a shit.

The detectives come over at this point and ask about the party in Shreveport where Debbie was last seen.  (A party being the cover story for the Witch War)  Lily Leeds thinks that Sooke might have killed Debbie.

After they leave Alcide arrives to take Sookie to the funeral, which is apparently going to be very formal.  He asks her if there’s anything she wants to tell him about the night of the Witch War.  There’s nothing she wants to tell him.

It turns out that the funeral of a packmaster marks the opening of the campaign to replace him.  Alcide’s father is standing as packmaster and Alcide may sort of forced Sookie to stand in support of them by asking her along.

He could have asked.

There’s a very strange man at the funeral with a shaved head.  No one seems to want to talk about him or to him.

There’s some speeches and stuff and it’s very high and intense politics.

Also Alcide knows Sookie killed Debbie.

Sookie handles this very well.

“You either believe in me, or you don’t. Either you think I’m the kind of person who’d kill a woman for no good reason, or you know I’m not.”

Alcide says he doesn’t care, but Sookie calls him out on what it is.  Bullshit.

They say when one door shuts, another one opens. But they haven’t been living at my house.

Most of the doors I open seem to have something scary crouched behind them anyway.

Watch some of Dottie’s videos otherwise a bear will stare at you.

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2 thoughts on “A review of Charlaine Harris’s ‘Dead as a Doornail’ chapter six

  1. I love the mockery of the clothes porn in your reviews*, because I always cringe when Harris goes into detail on the clothes in the novels, especially Sookie’s. Everything she wears sounds so atrocious, and I can’t figure out if C. Harris is just stuck in the eighties where things like crop tops, short flared skirts, bronze silk blouses, detached sleeve dresses, etc. might be considered classy or sexy (think ‘American Psycho’ or any Robert Palmer video), or if she is intentionally mocking the idea of classy/sexy in the hillbilly American South. I suppose the last alternative is that Harris herself is from the South, and the descriptions are earnest reflections of her tastes as a result of that. The South is, after all, rather notorious for being two decades behind in regards to trends.

    She also frequently references the WalMart, which just makes me more conflicted on which scenario is most likely to blame for the awful Clothes Porn. In that way I think it is likely to be sort of a hat-tip to how classless and unpretentious the area is, and also to her readers who one might assume would identify with that.

    I have way over thought this, as you can see.

    *re: Your reviews. I’ve been reading them non-stop for the last day since stumbling on you while trying to figure out what the hell is up with the Calvin-HotShot-Incest-Pappy situation. I know you can see the google searches that brought people here, since you mentioned that in one of your reviews, so that ‘wtf incecest?’ query you see was mine.

    • Don’t worry, I’ve had much,much weirder searches from google…

      Nah, it’s fun to over-think things! I think personally that Harris sort of walks the line between truly reflecting the American south and being rather satirical.

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