A review of Charlaine Harris’s ‘Dead as a Doornail’ chapter four


Sookie drives Charles Twining back with her to Bon Temps.  I haven’t especially touched upon it in my reviews, but Sookie finds being around human brains very distracting; I were to describe it, imagine that human thoughts are each a single buzzing wasp.  The buzzing wasps are all flying into her head to make a home and buzz around it, which is tiring and uncomfortable.  Being around a vampire is like someone killing all the buzzing wasps, in hopefully rather nasty and cruel ways, to restore beautiful equilibrium.

Where was I going with this? Oh yes, I really hate wasps.

Moving on.

Sookie and Charles Twining make uncomfortable small talk in the car.

It’s utterly so utterly scintillating I shan’t even bother to blow your minds with it.

We learn that Charles actually was a pirate, a development that I don’t know what to feel about.  I ought to be excited because, well, I really like pirates, like everyone else in the world.  (That’s the romanticized ideal of seventeenth and eighteenth century pirates, not the modern Chinese and Somali variants.)  However, Harris has been really bad in her characterisation when it comes to these grand historical ideals, tending to rely on stereotypes rather than any good research or interesting ideas.  So I’m going to remain ambivalent about Charles for the time being.

She drops off Charles at Merlotte’s, where Sam greets her by being an utter arsehole. I don’t understand whether the reader is supposed to like Sam or not.  We are told that he is a good man and a great friend to Sookie, but it’s a side we see only rarely.  He spends most of his appearances yelling at Sookie and being a dick.  I don’t really understand.

Jason asks Sookie if she wants to go visit Calvin in hospital, to which she agrees.

Then some bad shit goes down.

A guy with a ponytail (immediately I have an innate distrust of him) comes in and asks if she is Sookie Stackhouse.  Turns out that this is Jack Leeds, a private investigator, who has been hired by the Pelt family to find their missing daughter.

Right you are.

Jack doesn’t think Debbie vanished voluntarily.  Right you are again.

His face changed then; it was like someone had switched on a light behind his eyes.  He was looking at the woman he loved, and when she saw him, the same light switched on behind her eyes, too.  She came across the floor to his table as smoothly as if she were dancing [...].  They didn’t kiss, but his hand slid over hers and squeezed just briefly.

That is genuinely lovely.  Why can’t she write a romance book about them?

“Hello,” she said. “I’ve just been out to your house.”

thats so creepy why would you say that

The detectives get interested in the local shootings, then ask Sookie for an informal interview. She agrees and gives them directions to her house to talk tomorrow.

They know where your house is Sookie.  They’ve just been there. Duh.

Sam says he’s sorry after work and Sookie finally calls him out on all his repeated bullshitting over the last four books. Horay!

And I dashed back to my car, feeling that my heart was much lighter than it had been before.  Being at odds with Sam had felt wrong.  I didn’t realize how that wrongness had colored my thoughts until I was right with him again.

uh how

you have literally been exactly same as ever

there have been no differences

aside from some discomfort caused by people coming to get you for that murder you did

and i would have thought that would be the heaviness on your bloody heart not sam being exactly the same as always

watch my video guys, it’s dead good.  Benedict Cumberbatch would totally give it thumbs up if I could find the picture.

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